jammy day

today.

was a pajama day.

literally did not change out of my pajamas

 all.

 day.

no teeth brushing,

hair combing,

showering,

or leaving the house . . . 

let alone my room for within the first 9 hours of being awake!

today i was a real life hermit.

and you know what?

i thoroughly and completely enjoyed

every

s

i

n

g

l

e

second of it:)

proof:

 

 today was a day of:

pondering

reflecting

crying

realizing

talking

telling

feeling

writing

listening

learning

loving

understanding

progressing

connecting

creating

breathing

thinking

praying

and

laundrying

:)

all in my jammies.

can i tell you some of my discoveries?

thoughts?

connections?

and feelings?

from jammy day?

okay:)

recently in class we have been diving into our own families:

the overall dynamics

how individual personalities contribute to the family's functioning

what role each member of the family plays

subsystems and relationships in the family

etc

and i tell you what.

it's been rather emotional.

i come from a blended family.

meaning:

my parents got divorced when i was 11 and my mom remarried a wonderful man with 5 daughters.

and so.

we are now a blended family of 10, comprising of 6 daughters, 2 sons and 2 parents... 

plus

5 brothers/sisters in law and 

3 grandkids.

there's a lot of us.

and always a lot going on

and we just keep growing.

in all of the digging and delving into the soul of my family,

i've found a lot of:

misunderstandings

disconnection

exclusion

division 

and

rejection

while at the same finding:

mutual compromise

love

connection

care

and

support

feelings have been:

hurt

shared

validated

suppressed

pretended

acknowledged

squashed

disregarded

and

considered.

and it's hard!

and great!

and terrible!

and amazing!

and dysfunctional!

and functional!

and healthy!

and unhealthy!

and

and

and!

family,

 and the dynamics of it and relations in it, 

are so many different things at the same time,

that sometimes . . .

(lets just be real)

it's hard to stay

sane. 

and today,

in my jammies,

i realized it's all actually

.

.

.

okay 

. 

. 

.

it's not bad,

not good,

not anything.

it just

simply 

is.

i can accept the things about my family and family members i cannot change.

i can accept what is,

while still fostering healthy boundaries and relationships in my "family of origin"

and committing to starting new patterns, dynamics and trends in my future "family of creation" 

the more you learn about your own family dynamics the more you can discover what traits you'd love to keep and which ones you'd rather discard.

think about your daily, weekly, holiday

family interactions.

and

observe

evaluate

consider 

and 

reflect.

the more you know and are aware,

the better you can use your agency and choose how you want your life and relationships to be.

you can

create it.

:)

and then you can create something new in your room like i did today:

 i love jammy day.

that's all.

xoxo

kelsiefay